Wednesday, 30 June 2010

Byzantium Endures

After the Cossacks routed the Turkish Army in 1667, the Sultan wrote to the Zaporozhki Cossacks demanding their surrender:

"As the Sultan; son of Muhammad; brother of the Sun and Moon; grandson and viceroy of Allah; ruler of the kingdoms of Macedonia, Babylon, Jerusalem, Upper and Lower Egypt; emperor of emperors; sovereign of sovereigns; extraordinary knight, never defeated; steadfast guardian of the tomb of Jesus Christ; trustee chosen by God himself; the hope and comfort of Muslims; confounder and great defender of Christians—I command you, the Zaporozhian Cossacks, to submit to me voluntarily and without any resistance, and to desist from troubling me with your attacks."

Zaporozhki Cossacks to the Turkish Sultan!

O sultan, Turkish devil and damned devil's kith and kin, secretary to Lucifer himself. What the devil kind of knight are you, that can't slay a hedgehog with his naked arse? The devil shits, and your army eats. You will not, you son of a bitch, make subjects of Christian sons; we've no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, fuck your mother.

You Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, goat-fucker of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, Armenian pig, Podolian thief, catamite of Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, an idiot before God, grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our dick. Pig's snout, mare's arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow, fuck your own mother!

So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife. You won't even be herding Christian pigs. Now we'll conclude, for we don't know the date and don't own a calendar; the moon's in the sky, the year with the Lord, the day's the same over here as it is over there; For this, kiss our arse!

Sunday, 27 June 2010

The England-Germany Magic Sunglasses

Having no interest whatsoever in football, I thought I would have the streets and shops almost entirely to myself this afternoon; myself, a handful of women, and the odd ageing queen.

God, how I misunderstood that situation - in Manchester the England-Germany game filtered out most of the humans and left the streets populated largely with the Robot-Slaves of the Death God in their beards and burkas, with their swarming grubs and no crowd to hide amongst.

It was like that moment in "THEY LIVE" when John Nada puts on the sunglasses he's found and can suddenly see how many alien invaders there are on the streets.

So as quickly as I could I walked to the bus stop, past Cafe Italia Halal, Chico's Mexican Halal, the Abergeldie Halal, Kebabish Halal, and Zorba's Greek Deli Halal and got out of the Hellmouth that was once central Manchester.

Should the Great Correction ever come it will have to be deep, thorough, and complete.

Thursday, 24 June 2010


The song unsung
The love not made
The flesh unknown
The promise lost

The time long past
The time unused
Was time still spent
And time that ends

Friday, 18 June 2010

And Another Bone

Again, in the early hours, a full hard on.

This really must be fundamentally psychological

Thursday, 17 June 2010


Another boner last night, normal size and firmness - again, on the edge of sleep in the early hours.

Another sign that my impotence isn't physiological

Sunday, 6 June 2010


In session with my Eating Disorders Psychologist last Thursday she told me that she was suspending my dieting treatment because she doesn't think that I have an eating disorder as such, she thinks that I have such a deep sense of shame and self-criticism that it disables me, and that the only effective mechanism I presently have to soothe my distress is eating to the point of discomfort to stifle it. She is continuing to treat me for at least another four sessions, but she will be trying instead to come up with a strategy to help me cope with the distress I feel, so that she can perhaps continue with the weight-loss therapy afterwards if it succeeds. She says she doesn't want to take away my one source of self-soothing even though it is causing me health problems and exacerbating my psychological problems, because she seriously fears for my mental health if she did.

I've known all my adult life there was something badly wrong, although until this impotence began and it shut down my sense of a future, I did have other things I could do to distract myself from how bad I felt.

I've explained elsewhere that when I came to realise why I felt so paralysed - the years of bullying from my dad, and my being mocked and excluded by other kids and even by teachers at school because I was fat - and I told John G, he said "I knew it. I didn't know exactly what it was, but I suspected it had a lot to do with your dad: of all the people I've known, you were the one who should have been supercharged for success, and I knew it must have been something huge that was holding you down".

Asking me about my feelings and my hopes, My psychologist said "you must feel very frustrated and feel that life has been very unjust".


On a tangent, I remembered yesterday evening that in the couple of years before my dad died, my mam told me she had been looking for a little job and a bedsit so that she could move out and leave him, so bad had their marriage become. At the time she would have been nearly 70. I think she probably would have done had he not taken ill and her sense of duty made her stay and nurse him. In a fair world, he would have been the one who left.

She was a better person by far than he was. She was a sweet, kind woman.

It occurred to me yesterday that he was essentially Gollum from the Lord of the Rings, a shrivelled creature obsessed with having his treasure and with hiding it from us and the world so it did nothing for him and us except eat him up and deform our lives.

Tuesday, 1 June 2010

Straight Back At Ya, Abdul

What we must do:

Turkey to be handed to Greece, converted to Orthodox Christianity or atheism and renamed Elleniki Anatolios. Any muslims refusing conversion to be deported to "Dar ul-Islam". Analogous processes to be implemented in all the following cases.

Iran to be made a protectorate of the UN and renamed Greater Armenia, with a province reserved for returning Zoroastrians aka Parsis.

The Caucasus islamistans to be dissolved and merged into New Georgia and handed back to the Buddhists and Zoroastrians

Syria to be placed under the control of Lebanese Maronite and Orthodox Christians and renamed Syria Christiana.

Jordan and the Arabian Peninsula to be renamed Isra'el Transjordan on the understanding that the Israeli armed forces turn Mecca and Medina to plains of irradiated glass.

The whole of North Africa to be renamed Sub-Mediterranean Europe, except for Egypt, which will be renamed Egypt from its present namer Misr, and handed back to the Copts.

Pakistan and Afghanistan to be renamed and repopulated as the Central Asian Buddhist Republic.

Malaysia and Indonesia to be renamed the Balinese Archipelago.

A small cave complex  in the Tora Bora mountains of the newly renamed Central Asian Buddhist Republic to be declared "the Abode of Islam (Dar ul-Islam)  and made home to the world's remaining muslims. As there will be no arable land, the UN to supply them with all the pork they can eat.

Let's see how they like getting payback for the murder of over 100,000,000 non-muslims