And on 18th May, after looking after her through a year of illness, after supporting her as she worked at launching her career, and after a brief spate of illnesses myself, after all my love, after helping her all day at a promotional event and driving her home at midnight in teeming rain...
...she dumps me because I'm not getting well quickly enough and I'm holding her back.
I have never felt so lost and sad and bereft in my life, and that's including the loss of my parents.
Her brother, a Consultant Psychiatrist, says that she is mentally very fragile and on the verge of falling apart, and projecting all her fears about herself onto me.
She was difficult, she was hard work, I love her and I miss her so much.
And I'm terribly afraid I'll not find anyone else nor get her back because my health and employment chances are now very poor.